You can’t always control the experience—but you can choose the review.

It began in hospitality. I started noticing that some guests seemed bound to have a one-star experience regardless of the care, effort, or recovery my team and I offered. Others arrived open to possibility and helped turn even an imperfect experience into a five-star one.

Then I began seeing the same pattern beyond the restaurant—in my everyday life, in my personal history, in myself, and all over the world. We carry our baggage, stress, defensiveness, gratitude, generosity, and expectations into every encounter.

The difference was not always what happened. Often, it was how someone chose to meet what happened. I had to decide which kind of person I wanted to be and what I wanted to put into the world.

I decided I did not want to walk through life writing one-star reviews.